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Real Love…….really? December 30, 2012

Posted by shelleygblog in Uncategorized.
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It is when we look backwards, that most desirable gift of hindsight, that we find love, or at least recognize the signs. I first loved as a child loves, fully trusting, fully dependent, fully focused on fulfilling my needs, and being completely in love with the person who provides.  It is here that love stops for some; even as adults, they need care taking, their wants satisfied, taking, not giving, to feel adored, complete, and finally loved.

Then most move on to “crush”, first love, puppy love when we forget our own needs and spend all our time and energy pleasing the other person, hoping, manipulating, forcing them to love us, to give us value; it is often during this time that we learn quickly as females to give our bodies… and we imagine this is the super glue, the loan, the gift-that-cannot-be-repaid-nor-duplicated that will keep love alive.

Then we finally figure out who we are, our priorities, discover a self so inside that invitation only is mandatory. The closer one gets to their truth, the closer their love becomes honesty…and the closer we become to ourselves, the closer we can be to another.

It is risky. It is like going from Monopoly money to one’s life savings. The ante rises as we go from necessity, dependence to trust and invitation. It is a simple equation: the self gets bigger, the love gets bigger; the self gets honest, the love gets honest.

And so it is with him. I have grown into real love. I have grown into him. And nothing, NOTHING in my world is the same. I risk, I pray, I invite, and I give; not for him, but with him.

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